Mortal Mist

[30th January 2012]

Thank you all for the kind words,

Today I bring signs of progress, so good news

30th January 2012

Despite being very tired, I take a fair amount of time to fall asleep. I feel my body becoming heavy, and start visualising background colours in my brain despite still being awake, very unusual feeling. The backgrounds I "see" are; A very colourful LSD style one, Lots of small sweets (candy) in green and blue colours mainly, Swirling fire, Natural Crystals and finally I see what I interpret to be a view from the bottom of the ocean, as a dark marine blue slowly opens to me. This is starting to form an actual image rather than just random colours, but as I am dozing off my housemate in the next room starts talking loudly and I snap out of it....Drat.

Not long after, I am slipping into a similar state again, except without the images. I start to feel myself going numb and my leg starts to shake. I think this is my body just assuming that is what happens when I fall asleep, rather than a natural reaction, as I have been reading DrTech's DJ and he describes how a WILD makes your body work. Nonetheless, I soon find myself thinking "hold on where am I?". This is fantastic news, even though the answer is in fact nowhere as I am not dreaming, I knew that if I found myself asking that question I would in fact be asleep. So I open my eyes to perform a RC and unfortunately, I find myself wide awake in my room and most certainly not dreaming :(

My memory is now blank until I am fully asleep, and my only dream recall of the night. It starts in a town we will call C.R, and I am watching what feels like a cutscene from a television program (If you've ever watched Hustle, a show where con artists steal from criminals, it was like that). The characters are Matt Damon and the blonde lady from Hustle. They are lovers, and work together to steal the money from the bad guys. Something must have gone wrong, as they find themselves being chased out of the city by the criminals. Matt Damon tells the girl he will not leave her side, although once the baddies catch up the girl falls down and he takes the money and leaves her, which I found very entertaining.

This is where I step into the dream, as I either become Matt, or he gives me the money, as I find myself running away and trying to make it to my original hometown (not my current one) as C.R. is in the same area. Although I have the recall of a goldfish, I do remember that I have had many dreams like this before where I have committed some sort of crime and need to run away from someone. Anyway, I find myself in a field staring at a train track, knowing that the criminals will probably get the train to my hometown to try and find me. I see a very slow freight train moving in the opposite direction, so I use it as cover and run for it. My memory is then blank until I am at the town before my destination, where I meet someone I am currently at University with. He starts asking all sorts of questions "What's in the bag? Will you get the bus with me tomorrow? Doesn't (? - item) really suck?" I shoo him away and realise I need to go to the local shop to spend some of the money (Trying to get rid of the evidence I guess). However, instead of finding myself in a shop in this town I am now in my hometown, success! I head into the off-license (liquor store) as I will be able to spend more money in there, however all they now sell is £0.99 soft drinks. I hear my friend J.K. talking to the shopkeeper saying "I bet business sucks now you don't sell alcohol". She agrees, and I take this as my cue to leave as there is nothing of interest for me in this shop any more. The dream ends as I leave the shop.

I also know I had another dream about Minecraft, but I can't remember it so I'll mark it as a fragment.

I felt so close to lucidity today, it was disappointing to be teased like that. I also find that I have so little control over my dreams that I don't do reality checks. I'm also 90% sure that I never dream myself a body, so how am I supposed to do them anyway? I need to find a way to make my dreams seem more realistic, so that if I do have a lucid dream at least it will seem more real than these hazy memories...

[1st February 2012]

1st February 2012

I was expecting this morning to be writing another depressed post about having no recollection. However, this is only half true. I have a memory of being angry at my housemate for stealing my orange juice, and when I asked them they went quiet instead of denying it. It wasn't until I went to grab a drink this afternoon that I realised the carton was not even open.

Oh dreams, you deceiving devil. That has to be the most convincing dream I've had, as I woke up and assumed it was a real memory. Everything was in place, and if I had done a RC there I believe I could have had an amazing lucid.

Onwards and forwards, I will get there soon :(

[7th February 2012]

7th February 2012

I attempted to do a WILD last night, by using the WBTB method. First of all let me share a fragment of a dream I had before waking up initially.
All I can remember is being at a computer using Facebook chat to talk to some friends, one of whom said a really strange thing to me. Other than that it was a very normal and realistic dream, the text was legible and correct so it didn't trigger a reality check.

___

I woke up naturally at 4am, but my alarm was set for 5am and as I hadn't fell asleep until about midnight I decided 4 hours was not enough sleep so I went back to sleep to hopefully get another REM cycle. At 5am I wake up and spend about 10 mins doing a few random things, I ate some chocolate as I heard that is helpful, read a small bit of a book and went to the bathroom.

When I returned to bed, I lay flat on my back and went over the advice I had been reading about WILD's in my head. I started to feel sleepy and wasn't seeing any HI, so I imagined places and scenes where I could be, which was working quite well. My body was relaxing and I'm almost certain my legs "fell asleep", so to speak. About 20 minutes passed and I was starting to see some HI, but not enough to form a dreamscape. My left foot starting twitching, but other than that no vibrations. I then started imagining a dreamscape where I was in a desert staring at a pyramid. I focussed hard on the pyramid, trying to pull myself into this world. I felt my entire body go dead at this point, I became really heavy and sunk into the sheets. However as I noticed this, I started losing my image, and no matter how hard I tried it slowly disappeared into blackness.

I had heard there were usually 2 stages similar to this in completing a WILD, so I focussed again in the hopes of having the second one where I would then be dreaming. However, a lot of time passed and I had no such experience. After I had been in bed a total of 1h30m I finally gave up and just went to sleep normally. Not only do I have no recall from the second part of my sleep, I also slept through my first class. This morning went terribly bad :( hopefully I can have better luck tonight.

If anyone has any tips or advice, please please please share.

[9th February 2012 (fragment)]

Not much more to report as usual, I tried a few more WBTB's but they failed and messed up my recall :(

9th February 2012 (fragment)
I am a character in the game Left 4 Dead 2 (a zombie survival game) with my flatmates, and I seem to have an obsession with picking up the pain pills. After chugging the contents of 3 canisters, I find myself unable to swallow any more pills, which wakes me up.

I think this dream was induced because I was looking up G online shortly before going to bed

One dream I do remember from a solid night of sleep though.

10th February 2012

I find myself in the familiar situation of wanting to escape from somewhere. Me and my friend are for some reason trying to escape the town we live in (he moans about it all the time, but I don't mind living here). We are backpacking along the railway lines, sort of a lord of the rings style adventure with the big rucksacks travelling alone. I assume we were travelling in this odd fashion to avoid being spotted. Obviously there are lots of bad guys that won't let you leave the town you live in.

We are hiking for a while and creeping out of the way when I fall over on the train track. In case you can't guess this already, of course this was followed by a train heading straight towards me. I roll onto the opposite track but then suddenly the train is on that track instead. I roll back just in time and clutch on to avoid being sucked under the train (I'm not sure if that happens in reality, but I've always been told it's possible to get sucked under a train). I brush myself off and we head onwards to escaping.

My friend then complains that he is thirsty, but we can't go to a shop so I take him to the river to get fresh water. There was a brief encounter with a strange man, probably a farmer, here but I don't recall that too well. We are at the river and there is a very steep bank that is far too high to reach the water from. Before I get the chance to warn him not to fill up here he has already leant over, and fallen into the river. At this point he suddenly becomes a different friend, but I do not notice and sprint down the riverbank trying to keep up with him (friend #2).

The location changes and I am in what I believe to be a water filtration plant, and my friend is up against the bars that sift out debris. I first try and rescue his backpack that has sunk to the bottom of the river, but then he starts to drown so I dive in after him (I'm such a hero). I manage to save him despite my terrible swimming abilities, which I think I have already mentioned, and then I go back to try and find his bag. The bag is missing, but it turns out someone rescued it and handed it in as lost property to the bar maid (this water plant had a bar apparently). I go to get his bag back but the dream ends.

------

Still noticing a common theme in my dreams of running away, don't think that is unique to me though. This is the second time I have found myself swimming, might try to use that in future when trying to induce a WILD, and also for Reality Checking. Slightly annoyed at myself for the terrible recall lately, maybe I will get lucky and have a WILD tonight :-)

[12th February 2012]

The WILD wasn't successful, but here is 2 dreams I can recall

12th February 2012
I can't remember the setting but there is a pandemic of vampires everywhere. We don't know who the vampires are, but they are all wearing V for Vendetta style masks. I think the "good guys" are all wearing masks too, but I can't remember the style of them. There is also a lot of Christmas trees everywhere, which the vampires like to hide behind.

While hiding from the vampires, I find two masks under a table, one good and one bad. This means one of the people who is on our side is secretly a vampire. I later somehow realise it's one particular person, and I name and shame them. They say I'm lying but I tell everyone to look under the table and my point is proven. The vampire tries to run away and hides behind a Christmas tree, which has a stepladder over it, trapping him in place. We can't touch him, but someone suggests water so I pick up a bucket and throw it on him. He starts screaming as he begins to evaporate, the water turns to steam immediately on contact. A few buckets later and he is completely gone, although we ruined the Christmas tree in the process :(

------

(Fragment)
I am in a back cave which later leads to the area where dream #3 is. There is lava and water everywhere (minecraft style) and my friend D has made a mob killing system using the lava and water. I am impressed and decide I want him on my "team".

-----

Second dream and I am at a house party of some kind, playing the game Assassin's. If you've never heard of the game, it's a real life role playing game where you go around trying to "kill" other people with ridiculous weapons like Nerf guns, Water pistols and bananas. Me and my team are devising a plan to kill other members, which we do in secret on a balcony which we used a ladder to get up to. A few minutes later, I spot that there is string everywhere and we can attach a note saying it's deadly razor wire then push someone in to it for an assassination.

However, as I am about to do this I spot a high priority target facing the other way, so I pick up a pen and walk behind him and shout "STAB", before dropping the pen and running away to protect my life and identity. However, the player is someone from primary school who I didn't like very much, and being the douchebag he was he pretends nothing had happened. His team leader also plays along, and even when I prove it by showing the murder weapon they still don't agree. I start getting really angry and worked up, stealing the guy's food from the cupboards in the party and throwing it around everywhere.

I then hear the team leader in the distance talking about me, using less than appropriate words. At this point I go ballistic, I start shouting and screaming and tell him to say that to my face. I chase him all the way to the front door, and then I start shouting some more. As I lean in to punch him, I naturally wake up.

[15th February 2012]

This isn't my most interesting of dreams and very poor recall on my part, so feel free to ignore my post today

15th February 2012

A failed WBTB because I was too lazy to get up and turn the light on... I'm literally kicking myself for falling asleep during this.

Nevertheless I do have some recall.

The dream before my forced awakening was of me going to the pub with my friends. A very normal scenario, except as soon as I got there I left immediately. I was then suddenly eating chicken off the bone, and then I walked to a pizza shop and bought a pizza which was horribly burnt. I have noticed this before in dreams that food will often look very disgusting and unappealing, something to watch out for...

I had another dream after falling asleep again where I was in some foreign city with people I don't talk to any more. This is all I can recall, but I do know I was constantly waking up and falling asleep again (not FA's) last night, I had remembered many dreams but I was too tired to write them down. I was well aware they were dreams and would like to think it was my conscience fighting my SC over control of the dream, but who knows.

As I said, I was very tired throughout the whole night and I think it stopped an opportunity to become lucid. My G should be arriving any day soon so maybe that will help kickstart some WBTB lucids.

[19th February 2012]

An awful lot of fragments today but they made me forget some of the details of my main dreams. Not sure if this is a positive or negative change to my recall.

19th February 2012
I find myself at my University with one of my lecturers and a group of other students. For some reason I am under the impression that we are all applying for a job. We are taken into a class to watch a film, but instead of being handed the same copy book as everyone else I get a unique one as I'm in an "interview". The questions all begin with "Where...." and don't make much sense, but I can't remember any of them I'm afraid. After this I find myself at a vending machine buying lots of pastries (What an odd thing to sell in one), way more than I could possibly eat. After this we invite the lecturer back to our house for bacon sandwiches. He tells us he is a very busy man, and must go somewhere else for bacon after our bacon. He then complains that he has a hard life

Another dream I am in a Big Brother style reality TV show, where everyone is locked inside a house for the show. However I have joined very late, about a week from the end, and everyone seems to hate me for this fact. I don't really know what to say about it as it's not my fault, and I don't know how I got in there. I also remember being by the pool for something, but can't think why.

There was a dream about me being a superhero, but I can't recall anything from that.

My final dream was me talking to someone about memory and recall. I was telling them I was proud that I'd recalled so many dreams today (I had woken up and fallen back to sleep), but they didn't seem to care. They were telling me that they had remembered some family member's birthday was today. I thought silently that they were not quite on the same wavelength as me so I stopped talking about memory. The dream ended.

[20th February 2012]

I had some interesting dreams last night, despite having no lucids. I have had significantly better recall the last two days, I believe it's because I've been eating bananas before bed. I will keep doing this in future.

20th February 2012

The first dream I recall being back in the Minecraft world watching someone plan his house. However instead of making it out of blocks he appears to be drawing plans in a cartoony style similar to MS Paint. It was a rather odd house, there was a gate instead of a door, and the only thing inside the house was a wooden stage. Also one wall was made out of brick while the others were made out of wood. The guy who is building the house turns out to be a person I watch videos of on youtube, called K.

I then remember nothing until a dream where I am in a fish and chip shop, wanting to buy a meat pie. It must be in some kind of food court, as there are 2 counters right next to each other selling similar things. I sit there and try and choose between them. I'm struggling to find the pie on the price list, which is agitating me as all I want to do is find out which store is cheaper and buy my pie.

At this point I had my first real false awakening. (FA). I could recall these two dreams and also one more, which upon actually awakening I had forgotten. Anyway for the FA I woke up and went to grab my DJ to write down what had happened. However someone had written in it, which makes me very angry as someone has probably read it too. The whole page is covered in big bubble letters in blue pen (I write in pencil) which say: BLUEBIRD SLEEP MOARE, where bluebird was replaced with my real name. I sit there confused for a while and then I wake up properly. It takes me a few seconds before I realise what just happened, and then I write down some notes for the two dreams I remembered.

I fall asleep again and find myself in a lecture (class). It is some sort of maths lecture, and I'm struggling to work out the answer of 4x2, which is the only notes I have written. The lecture ends but I stay for a few minutes trying to work it out. The lecturer then mentions something about cheese being expensive. A Chinese girl stands up and says she agrees, because all the Japanese students say it is expensive when they come here (I think my SC got the races mixed up). We then leave, and I convince my friend M to come to the next lecture as there is free pizza. I'm not sure if there was really free pizza, or if I was lying to make him come. Both are equally likely.

I am walking with C and M and we are in the train station trying to get a train to our next lecture. We spot a train on another platform and the announcer says something like "Open door challenge, please mind the platform". I then tell my friend that only in Liverpool do the doors stay open on trains and they call it a "Challenge". This makes me realise we are currently in liverpool. We decide we want to get food so we walk off in search of a place selling food. At this point we are suddenly in an airport. C decides she wants to go to the toilet, but on her way back out she gets pulled over for a security check. She is taken into a closed room with a middle aged lady wearing rubber gloves... God help her! Once she comes out again she is quite angry, and just as I am looking at the train or plane times the dream ends.

------

I'm struggling to find meaning from these dreams I had, most interesting is the food theme and the false awakening. Maybe it's a metaphor and my SC is hungry? This is the second night I've dreamed about food. The false awakening I believe was meant to scare me, which it kind of did. I wonder if I'll notice another one in future. It's also worth noting I did not even think about RC's during any of my dreams, they seem to have worked their way out of my SC, which I do not like :(

Edit: I'd like to add that I recorded the time during an awakening, 6:18am. I fell asleep between 12-12:30, meaning one REM cycle ends after about 6hours. I will bear this in mind and sleep for 5-5:15 hours next time I WBTB

[21st February 2012]

Again I ate two bananas before bed and my recall is amazing. I can't say it is directly because of the bananas, I could just be getting better at recall. We will see when I run out of bananas Anyway here I have a few main dreams and many fragments, enjoy!

21st February 2012
The first dream I remember was writing a program (I study Computer Science IWL) to allow 3D movements throughout a world. It's a very basic thing to do but in my dreams I guess it was a challenge. Later on, I see my dad has bought some kind of games controller and he's trying to figure out how to work it. I tell him this is very convenient, as I've just written a program that does exactly that! He seems happy with his new toy so I feel like I have done him proud. This is all I remember of the dream.

I have another dream where I am with my friends K and O and we are waiting for a bus to take us to campus. We are joined by James, who I don't really like but he is friends with the others so it's ok. The bus comes but because we are distracted by James a lot of other people push in front of us and there is not enough room on the bus, which makes me very angry at James - he should have been on time! Our friend M says "It's ok right, one of you can drive?". I can't but the others all say they can, but they don't have cars. At which point M says we can borrow his 5 seat 1970's ______. I don't know what that make of car is but it sounds posh, so I make a note we should be careful. We walk off into the woods to find his car, but the dream ends before we find it.

I am currently in the process for applying for jobs, and one of the companies who gets back to me sends me a very rude rejection letter. It is an email that looks as though it has been written from a phone, as it is in TXT SPEAK and very poorly formatted. I don't remember all the text but it basically says "We don't need Java programmer we need C# so NO". I also remember it had a lot of smilies in it, which I tend to use too much on forums and such. I remember that one of the lines had something like "Sad news sorry no no no :( :(".

But enough about the letter, this led me to go to the interviewer's house (god knows why) where I got given a tour. I saw that they had a lot of PHP books and figured if they were spending this much on books they are probably very clever and/or rich. I then see something that sickens me. The family have a pet hamster that they keep in the tiniest hamster ball I've ever seen. There is not even enough room for the hamster to turn around. I am with a small boy, who I can only assume is my future son as I am responsible for looking after him. I tell him to look away and we go home. However when we get home, the small boy has stolen the hamster to try and give it a better home. I tell him that was the wrong thing to do, even though it was being treated poorly he should not be stealing from people. I tell him he can play with it for a bit but we must give it back before we get in trouble.

He lets the hamster out in the living room, but the door is open so I quickly dash to close it before the hamster escapes (almost slamming the door on the hamster). I then notice another door (even though our living room only has one door) so quickly dash to close that too. The hamster is extremely fast, which makes me think getting him back inside the ball will be a nightmare (no pun intended). It also makes me appreciate how good it must feel for the hamster to get to run around at last. I then get the image of a young boy crying, the owner of the hamster. He is much older than the boy I am with, and although he looks a bit rough and mean I can see he misses his hamster. With a little bit of trouble we collect the hamster and me and a woman (I guess his mother) go to take the hamster back. At this point I realise his mother was actually my real life mother, so I assume the dream was from my Dad's perspective and I was the boy. In hindsight I find this interesting in many ways, I'll look into it more when the dreams end.

I don't remember much more of the dream but we took the hamster back and got away with it so all was ok. When we return home I am helping Mum cook the dinner which, as always when I cook in dreams, I manage to mess up. She has a lot of pans full of vegetables and I think it will be quicker to cook them all in one, so I tip them into a wok or a frying pan and turn the heat up to full. She manages to fix the mess somehow but she isn't very impressed with me. This is the last thing I remember from the dream.


I had a fragment where I was cooking chips and I dropped a piece of steak into the fryer without noticing. When I went to eat the chips I noticed this big piece of meat, but decided to eat it anyway. My friend looked at me confused, but I told him it was "deep fried steak" and he just ignored me. When I bit into it it tasted cooked on the outside but still quite raw on the inside. Pretty good steak if you ask me!

I also had a fragment where we (Britain) were at war with Germany. They seemed really angry about something and I was worried after losing 2 wars they might get mad and just send nuclear bombs at us. I then dream of the olympics, and I think we beat Germany which makes them even madder. I get very scared and wake up.

------

There's a lot of interesting things here, from my point of view at least. Firstly, these dreams confirm something that I am aware about which is that I have a desire to "prove" to my parents I can succeed in life. I want to be successful and I want them to see my education has been worth it, which explains me writing that program that helped my Dad. Another very interesting thing is the fact I dreamed about myself from my Father's perspective. I was not the sort of child who would steal a hamster even if it was living in cruelty, so I think the dream was more about me realising I handle situations how my Dad would....Bluebird is growing up! The fragments don't seem to mean much, I finally got to eat so maybe I won't be hungry in other dreams. The war thing I don't really understand, I like Germany so it's not some sort of Vendetta. I'll ignore that dream as it doesn't seem significant.

One last note i'd like to make is my recall seems very good lately. I hope it can induce some lucids soon. I'll be attempting a WBTB with G tonight, so hopefully I can get that to work

[22nd February 2012]

I had a LUCID last night

Took 4mg G + 350mg Choline at WBTB, the WBTB failed but the dreams came later on.

22nd February 2012

Before the WBTB I have a fragment where I am with Harley from Epic Meal Time. Me and him are hanging out and he seems like a pretty cool dude. He hands me his leftover sandwich and I tell him I don't really want to eat it, but he tells me I must. The sandwich is falling apart and horrible but I eat it anyway.

I attempted to WILD in my WBTB but did not fall asleep, I think I got too excited when potential transitions came. I also kept getting itches on my face which, although I didn't scratch, were VERY irritating and distracting. Anyhow, later on I find myself in a dream...

I'm not sure how I know this but I am in London (travelling alone). I visit what I can only see as a cross between the London Dungeon and a regular house. It is full of actors who dress up as monsters and evil people, and then put on a show for you as you walk around the museum. However one of them is a really hot girl, and she seems to like me. She is very touchy-feely and I get the impression she has more interests than just providing the show for me. I start to flirt with her and she gives me something. It's some sort of book or diary. It's quite small, she tells me it's very important and I should not lose it.

We then go to watch an educational film with the rest of the tour group. I try to save her a seat but she never turns up :< I'm not sure what happened in the film but there was some sort of disturbance. I argued with some people and then I found myself chatting to some other actors. I am upstairs and I am looking around to find her again. I'm not really sure what happened next... But I think I had no luck and just wasted time.

I wake up and realise I can go back to sleep again easily so I do. I try to find the book that will tell me I'm lucid, for some reason that seems about right. I look under a fireplace which is the only thing I see and there is the book. The lucidity hits me. I am now in a room with 4 tiled walls and a white door. I start touching the walls and I am really excited and surprised by how real they feel. I open the door and wake up. I'm not giving up that easily! I don't even bother to check for a FA I just go straight back to sleep. I'm in a sealed room made out of minecraft blocks (wood planks/glowstone/wool). It is very pretty and in some sort of pattern with the 3 blocks. I go to touch the floor and wake up.

Again, I am NOT giving up on this! I fall back to sleep and I have a portal gun (like the game). I'm floating through some sort of asteroid field so I fire a portal at a rock and hop in. This is the most clear part of my dream. I find myself in my grandparent's house. My grandad is very ill in real life and I am concerned he might be dying, so I figure if I can talk to him in my dream there's the tiniest chance he might see me in his. I walk in and see just his head on the floor. He looks very sleepy. I quickly dive down and hold on to his head. I promise him I will put him back on his body. He tells me not to bother and starts to close his eyes. I shake him a little and tell him to look at me (like they do in films). I don't want him to pass out. At this point the head goes still, mouth wide open and eyes closed. His skin feels very dry and wrinkly. I think he might be dead. But then I realise that this doesn't have to be true, so I say "Grandad stop playing dead too that won't work on me". He starts laughing and I see through his clever trick. I then put his head on his body which is in his regular armchair.

I don't want to lose lucidity again, so I figure my grandparent's living room is the perfect place to stay (see previous failed WILD's - I can imagine this room well). I start thinking about the badge challenges and whether I can complete any of them here, as I'm sure that will make the experience much better. I see a clock on the wall and think "Perfect!". I walk over to it, curious to see what the time is. The clock reads "0:o1", which I guess was a 0 and a small 0, lol. I then tell my grandad I'm going to smash his clock as it's not real, mainly trying to see how he would react. He seems to realise I am in control and just says "no please don't" in quite an upset tone. I feel a pang of guilt but I want to see what will happen so I smash it anyway. It breaks pathetically on the floor and he just says "Oh no why did you do that". This wasn't going as entertaining as I thought, but just as I was getting bored my friend L appears in the dream. She says "What do you want to do now?". I tell her to take me back to the house in London from the previous dream, so I can go and meet that girl.

She obliges, and we leave the living room. However as I open the door I wake again. I quickly fell back to sleep but I believe I lost lucidity. I am in the basement of the creepy house looking around for the girl. I can't find her anywhere but I can find the other actors and their rooms. I also notice that I don't have a t-shirt on, so I am wondering where that might be. The rest of this dream is very fuzzy to me, but I did not find the girl and I know I did dip in and out of lucidity during it, which I had some fun with.

I don't even have much to comment on this one. The dream was a lot of fun, and I can't wait to tell Rebel_Seven so I can get some shiny new badges   I'd like to thank everyone so far who has given me advice, it's been so encouraging and helpful. I guess it's also worth mentioning the G probably enhanced the vividity of my dreams, and the WBTB probably made me start thinking about lucidity when I re-entered the dream

 

[24th February 2012]

24th February 2012

I guess I can stop talking about lucidity like it's a surprise now and start working on controlling it.

I attempted a WBTB but I guess I failed and fell asleep. I find myself in the Olympics basketball arena (spoke to Dad about it today because I have tickets). I remember I was thinking about this during the WBTB, so decide I should make sure it's not a dream. I look at the team names, one is Ukraine and the other is definitely Russia even though their jerseys say something different. Come to think of it, they were actually wearing Ice Hockey jerseys too lol. I start to get really suspicious at this point. I'm lying down on my front next to the court and I see my granddad. Ok i'm dreaming. I pause for a second or two to let the lucidity hit me fully and absorb the scene. The basketball game or crowd is not very vivid to me but my granddad is.

I try to think what I want to achieve in this lucid, and I remember I wanted to see what my hands look like. I say to him "Ask me to see my hands". He asks why, but I just repeat my request again. He asks me to show him my hands, and I raise them into view. At first they appeared quite normal which disappointed me, but then I realised my left hand was severely swollen and bent (right number of fingers though so that's a plus ). It was also quite blotchy, like I had eczema or something.  I'm then lying down again so I visualise being on a massage table, as I can't think of anything else where you lie on your front. I'm quite hoping for the scene to change, maybe I can have some fun with a masseuse but unfortunately as the dream fades out I just wake up.

Fragment: At some point between becoming lucid and waking up, I was talking to my grandparents about something, not sure what. My sister goes off to show my grandma something secret, and granddad walks off somewhere. I think at this point I go to the toilet and it's then that I wake up, but my recall isn't perfect this may be in the wrong order.

I grab my phone so I can note down some things from this Lucid for my DJ, which should have been an obvious sign as I use pencil and paper. I can't remember exactly what I wrote, but it had some playing cards in it with spades, and something about a dream, and my online username.

I then wake up for real, and after about 20 seconds I remember that I most definitely haven't recorded that dream. I get a little angry that I didn't notice the FA, but still I am happy for having a LD and I grab my pad to jot everything down. I've also drawn a picture of my left hand, in case anyone is interested

[25th February 2012]

25th February 2012

The first dream I recall is just a fragment, something about having a briefcase full of money and I either stole it or I'm about to do a deal. There is something illegal going on, and as always I am being chased/hiding from someone.

My next dream takes place in the pier of my current town. I can't remember what's happening but we are hanging out there and I see a shower room. I walk in and there is tonnes of public showers, and one cubicle in the corner. I walk over and see a big LD button with a light above it. LD obviously stands for lucid dream, so I go away to tell my friends I'm gonna go in the lucid dream chamber. I do so, and on my return the door to the chamber is wide open. I walk in and it's a very shabby room. It's like a prison cell, except the seats are made out of breeze blocks and the bed is just a metal thing with wires and no mattress. There is a small drain in the corner and no sign of a toilet. I'm distracted by the room and completely forget my motive to try and LD (even though I'm already dreaming...d'oh).

The next thing I remember I have left the room and not had my lucid dream, and we are outside on the beach. We are swimming around and there is a small island just off shore that everyone is swimming to. I swim to it and do a huge dive off, I wasn't lucid but I jumped extremely high and plummeted deep into the ocean. I saw a lot of really cool fish before swimming back up to the surface, where everyone was clapping for my spectacular dive. Hooray!

I believe I woke up shortly after (for real) and then went back to sleep. I was now in a dream where everyone was being controlled by some people (I guess you could say the government). I'm running all over the place in my old student accommodation, trying to get answers as to what's going on. I manage to piece together that there is some sort of organisation, that was set up by one guy. That guy was trained by some master in whatever discipline, and there is a lot of argument amongst the bad guys as to who is the true leader, although they all seem to agree with hating the public.

The guy who set up the company, we'll call Alex, had a big wrestler as his bodyguard, I believe it was The Big Show but I may be wrong. Also all the followers of this organisation walk around in grey hoods. The dream kept cutting between indoors and outdoors. Indoors I was watching a 3 hour long movie with some non-followers, and I was told we must prove our support by watching this movie. I'm pretty sure nobody wanted to see it, and it was full of propaganda. I kept sneaking out to go and talk to more people outside about what is going on.

I then find out there is this one particular bad guy (or a girl I believe) who is responsible for "keeping me quiet". I can't remember it exactly but she was saying all sorts of things to me to keep me quiet and on the side of the government. There was also a different girl who was trying to help me, in I guess my quest to take down the government. There was a lot of running around and timewasting in what felt like a very long dream, before finally I had learnt enough to take on the system. I walked into the big dining tent where everyone was including Alex and The Big Show. I walked in and screamed something out loud, it was something along the lines of:
"STOP LETTING PEOPLE CONTROL YOU. THIS IS MY LIFE AND I AM FREE"
"THIS IS MY LIFE AND I AM FREE"
Slowly some other people in the tent started to chant along.
"THIS IS MY LIFE AND I AM FREE"

We outnumbered the guards by a very large proportion. The Big Show came over to me and started making all sorts of threats, but some other guys came along to protect me. We stormed around chanting and shouting, towering over the guards. I went back to the accommodation where my friends where and there too everyone seemed happy and free. The bad woman came back but there was some sort of fight and she was defeated. I then saw a girl in my group of friends who I used to quite like and she liked me too, but it never went too far. She grabbed my shirt and said something like "It's about time" and pulled me out of the room. We started kissing and she was unbuttoning my shirt, at the same time we walked down the corridor towards my room. However, before we even got close to my room, the dream ended and I woke up :(

[26th February 2012]

26th February 2012

Fragment: I am at alton towers (theme park) with my Mum, my Sister and John Locke from Lost. Locke seems to want to go on some sort of mission, but all I care about is the rides. My Mum is too scared to go on any of the fun ones but she does ride one slow rollercoaster with me. I don't see much of my sister but when I do she is looking at the animals, which is odd as this is not a zoo so there is no animals. At some point in the dream I find some sort of key, and Locke tells me its one of a set of 3 keys, i'll look out for more in future dreams.

Fragment: I am playing counterstrike as one of the characters. It's surprisingly realistic, I have a big heavy gun and I aimed down it to shoot some guys. Then we swapped sides and we were attacking and they were defending. The building that we were in I believe is the same one from the next dream, I think I transitioned from one into the other.

I am an employee at a big skyscraper, working for some guy who is a real douche. For some reason me and the other employees have snuck in after hours and we are playing around. I get into a game of draughts with a lady and she is getting close to beating me (even though we are not playing by the rules and there are pieces in stupid places). To avoid defeat, I trigger some sort of warning that says we need to get back to work. She says "Oh no I'm not falling for that one", but all of the other DC's jump to their desks to go along with it and we convince her

Then some alarm goes off in the boss's house telling him people are in the building. We don't know about it yet, but the woman gets taken upstairs to the top floor, I'd assume the head office is up there. There is a big alien with lots of tentacles sitting in the office chair, but she changes the environment to trick the colleague into a false sense of security. We run away and there is some big ladders going down to floors 3,5 and 7, but we jump instead and hit the ground with a crash. At this point I can see my co-workers, one of them is Kyle from South Park, one is Wheatley from Portal 2 and I am one of the small hooded guys that steal robots in star wars (name anyone?). Kyle gets taken by a big machine that picks him up, and me and Wheatley stay in the corners quiet and not moving. Some big guard dogs come down and take Wheatley, and then another dog jumps down and stares me in the face.

At this point someone tells it not to get me. It gives a long story about how I'm a good guy and I apparently looked after this person's son or family member or something. When I look up, the character that gave this story is a giant bell, the sort you would find in a church tower. I saw nothing weird about this at the time and left the building. As I was leaving I saw the boss talking to his Dad. He is angry about something, and the old man is fragile and scared. He is angry because of us somehow, maybe the old man helped the bell or he was the one who let us in. The old man is crying and the boss still doesn't care. He tosses the old man a few notes of cash and tells him to get away and never come back. I leave and I am extremely angry. I observe the outside of the building and I remember thinking I should draw some graffiti on it. However, as I look closer it seems somebody has already done it, and there is no space left to write profanities about the guy who works there (good job SC you beat me to it )

[28th February 2012]

28th February 2012

I have made the classic mistake of waiting a few hours to write my DJ, so unfortunately there isn't much detail here.

I was dreaming of a zombie invasion. At some point we left someone behind, i'm not sure if he survived or not. We head to the nerds secret underground gaming basement to see if they will protect us. There is a display on the vault door, with a keypad to type in numbers. All of a sudden the display lights up and counts down from 5. The door swings open. Everyone assumes that the nerds have let us in, but I have a bad feeling about this. It's incredibly dark inside, and we can't see anything. I get tangled in a thorn bush but my friend S comes back to save me. Then we hear a noise so we all run off through this dark maze. Suddenly an old friend Tom comes jumping out of the darkness and shouts "BOO". We all jump, and at this point it is light again. He starts laughing but we are not impressed.

I remember at some point in this dream or another I was drinking an energy drink for some reason.

Also I have a fragment of my friend's E and C both giving me a book on how to make excellent orange juice. C looks sad because E gave me her's first, which makes C's gift look a bit crap. I really wanted that book too :( I would have liked some orange juice!

It's worth noting i've not had a dream in complete darkness before, so i'll watch out for it in WILD and DEILD attempts. No reality checks passing through to my dreams right now but my dreams are very inconsistent so I don't think they will. I wonder how I can make my dreams consistent...

[29th February 2012]

29th February 2012

It's morning. I'm tired and extremely angry. An attempted WBTB has left me with nothing but insomnia. I had no HI, no sleep paralysis and even though I was so tired my eyes hurt I could not get to sleep even when I gave up with the WILD. Not sure if G/C has anything to do with it, but the Choline probably didn't help. This will be the last night I take supps until I can WBTB properly without them.

As for dreams (before WBTB), nothing but a fragment. I was playing Dark Chess with Moonbeam (as I am currently) and I found her bishop. I was planning a sneaky move where I sacrifice my bishop for hers, as I am ahead on pieces. I lined up my bishop which revealed hers, and had the queen marking it. I then woke up.

I checked the chess game but unfortunately she doesn't have any bishops left so I couldn't cheat