Alcohol + WBTB
I was contemplating not drinking with my friends last night, from fear of 3 nights of bad recall. However, I still stand by my opinion that alcohol can be a valid LDS, and it gave me what I would describe as 10/10 lucidity (awareness) and 10/10 dream clarity. The same cannot be said for my control though, as per usual
16th March 2012
Attempting to WILD I feel myself falling asleep but get excited and my heart starts racing. That transition failed, but about 10 mins later I succeeded and fell asleep. I hear a knock at my door, it's my friend telling me to get up for swimming. I wish she'd go away, I know for a fact it isn't 11.30 yet and I don't have any recall (duh) so I want to sleep a little longer. She doesn't stop so I answer my door and nobody is there. Someone has spilled water on the floor outside my room and there is a towel on top of it. I guess that's what she was talking about.
I go back to my room and there is some mail on my bed. Hurray, I was expecting a delivery. But wait a minute what is all of this? I see two very large envelopes and lots of small ones. I try to read them but there is a lot of funny characters like japanese text. I manage to make out something about an invoice but that's all I'm getting. Oh wait a minute, my WILD must have worked. I pinch my nose and sure enough I'm still breathing. My immediate first instinct is to make sure I stabilize this dream so I actually have something decent to write about tomorrow.
I rub my hands and touch the walls, everything is amazingly clear and realistic, I'm liking this dream already. I decide my goals are to have a full conversation with a DC or to try and get to heaven (monthly meeting place). As I go to open my door I try to play a little trick like I did with the motorbike. I imagine there to be a white cat behind the door. I swing it open fully expecting the cat but am disappointed to see it's not there, and neither are any DC's. I head downstairs and suddenly hear a meow. Haha, what the hell SC? I see a small white cat (which actually looks more like a dog) before it quickly runs off through the cat-flap that we do not have.
I head downstairs into the kitchen but there is no furniture or appliances in here, it's just a really boring empty room. I start touching the walls and look out of the window to try and see the clouds (to aim for heaven). All I can see is blackness and rain hitting the window, it looks like a horrible day. Oh well, good job I'm lucid. I stroll out of the front door with no care for the pounding rain that is hitting the ground. The road outside is completely different to real life, it is very bumpy and seems to go up and down like a rollercoaster.
I choose to run to see how fast I can go in a dream, but I only seem to go as fast as I would IWL, except I don't get tired. This seems rather boring so I decide to jump like a triple jumper. This is much more fun but still not very fast. The rain has stopped now and I decide to give flying another go. This feels like kind of a big step as I am always a bit hit and miss with flying. At first effort I just jump and land straight back down. I then try to flap and other such silly actions. That works quite well but I don't get very far before landing again. I try to float and that is by far the most successful, as I start going straight up but I can't go forward. In the end I find some hybrid of floating and flapping and I manage a reasonable pace.
I see a bright cloud in the sky that I will imagine to be heaven, if I can get there then I believe I will see it. However I don't seem to be getting anywhere near despite flying. I try closing my eyes for a few seconds to see if I can teleport, but when I open them I see myself flying up ahead. This is very confusing, and when I think about it more I drop out of the sky and the copy of me disappears. I'm now by a busy road in CR and watching the traffic slowly move around a roundabout. There seems to be an abnormally large amount of lorries.
I try to imagine a lorry crashing into the big tree in the middle, as I think that it might be quite exciting, when I'm surprised to see it actually happens! The lorry jacknifes and the back part slams straight into the tree and crumples up a bit. I suddenly feel a small bit of guilt, that was someone's lorry that just broke because of me. I'll make it up to the driver if he presents himself in a dream. I float up again with the intention of getting to heaven, when I see my friend AT walking along the road casually. He looks extremely happy, and even though we aren't very close friends I am glad to see his DC looks cheerful. I am about to wave at him, but a wave just doesn't feel right so I smile at him. I try and make my smile represent that I am moving on to heaven, and I don't care because I am happy. He seems to understand, and smiles back. I then see a copy of him across the road walking straight towards him. This makes me nervous, I think I am reminded of anti matter. The two AT's high five and there is a loud noise (explosion, crash, or something else). Suddenly the copy turns into a different person SR. I am very confused by this but it is only a dream so I shrug it off.
I can't get any closer to my cloud so I land in search of something else to do in this dream. I walk to the side of the road and some truck driver gets in my way (karma I guess). I walk around the back of the truck when I start to see black. I realise the dream is ending and do everything I can to bring it back. It isn't working so my next idea is to try and get into the void. However, that also fails and I wake up. I do a RC for good measures and then start writing my journal.
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Morning nap:
I apply for early access to some sort of game and I get it. I'm not sure why but this seems to make me cool and popular. When I head to the place where I can get my game, I see my ex-girlfriend J. J does not look happy to see me at all. I don't have time to speak to her now, but I will go and say hi when I get another chance and apologise to her. I head to some tall glass building where I have to meet someone about the game. For some reason the deal goes sour and I end up blowing up the building. I have to jump a long way down to miss out some flights of stairs, so that I make in in time.
When I get out of the building J is there again, she saw what I just did and I think she is glad I am alive. We talk for a little bit, in which I apologise to her and she also apologises to me. I haven't seen her since we broke up and I have always felt guilty because of that. After a long conversation I find myself back in my room at university, packing to go home. I appear to have way too much stuff to fit in the car and I'm worried that it won't fit and Dad will be angry. J is back and along with my sister B they help me to pack my things which is very nice of them. I have a PSP or something and I show it to J, it must be the thing I got from that office building. She seems quite interested (even though she always hated it when I play games). Some time around here the dream ends.
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Fragment: I see the simpsons and they are in the car heading somewhere. Homer has booked a restaurant for them but is keeping it a surprise for Marge. I believe it was called "The Visage" (vi-zaaa-ge). Bart and Lisa keep giving away clues about where the restaurant is and Homer is shouting and getting angry. I'm not sure if this is an actual clip from an episode or just my imagination
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There is a lot of meaning for me in the non lucid dream. I have felt bad about breaking up with J as it was not exactly what you call smooth, although these things rarely are. Since I started lucid dreaming, I have always wanted to go back and make peace with her DC, in the hopes that she might see it in her dreams. I doubt I'll ever see her again, but I do care so I would like to hope the message can get through. I'm pretty sure there is more meaning there too although I can't put my finger on it right now